Did He Just Say...?

Eli was helping me make a pizza and as I started chopping up a bell pepper he proclaimed, "Wow! You're the coolest mom in the world!"

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We were on a walk and Eli, without notice, jumped out of the stroller and ran straight into the road right as a car was driving by. When we got home I had a stern talk with him:

Me: "Eli! You Can't run into the road like that! You almost got hit by a car! Do you know what would happen if you got hit by a car?"

Eli: "I would get hurt?"

Me: "Yes. You would get hurt. You could even die!"

Eli: "I know. I'll never do that again."

Me: "Eli. Do you know that if you die, you'd never come back again. You'd be gone for good." (Trying to emphasize it's not like a video game where the player "dies" and comes right back to life two seconds later.)

Eli: "Jesus died."

Me: .....

Eli: "And he never came back to life again."

Me: "....Uhhhhh....Well. He did come back to life."

Win -- Eli

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Eli pointing to his leg, "Mom. This leg is eight years old."

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Carson every night, "Dad! I hurt my owie so long." 

Translation - My owie hurts really bad.

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We have had a lot of near-death brushes the past few weeks with Eli. One day he was riding his bike home from a friend's house and he rode way far ahead of me without stopping until he made it all the way home. Another stern talking to included:

Me: "Eli! You can't ride off when I am asking you to stop. A car could back over you because they wouldn't see you all by yourself."

Eli: laughing like I'm an idiot, "Mom. My bike is much faster than cars."

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Eli, while dumping a box of toys on his head, "ICE BUCKET CHALLENGE!"

(For 20 years down the road, the ice bucket challenge is an internet phenomenon where everyone is dumping ice water on their heads for ALS awareness and donations. Such a phenomenon that even my 4-year-old is aware of it.)

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We have a monster truck toy that has "Bad Attitude" written on its hood, so we refer to it as Bad Attitude. Carson however refers to it as, "Badittude."

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Carson one Sunday as Sacrament meeting was starting kept yelling, "Where's Primary?!?" "But where is PRIMARY??!?"

I tried to console him and tell him he'd be going to nursery after Sacrament Meeting. Then his Nursery leader walked in and he screamed with glee, "THERE'S PRIMARY!!!!"

He completely adores his nursery teacher, who I often say is basically a celebrity in Carson's eyes.