Stories of Jeff Excell - Seat Swiper

Getting four girls to church early was a rarity. For some reason clothes never seemed to fit right on a Sunday morning.

But one Sunday (to Jeff's delight) we actually made it in our seats with minutes to spare. Jeff took the unique opportunity to strategically place his scriptures next to me. As he got up to pass the sacrament he said, "Save that seat for me. . . Unless you were saving it for 'You Know Who.'"

"You Know Who" is the "He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named" of our story. Jeff loved to tease me about Tanner. I always laughed and rolled my eyes. How many times did I have to tell Jeff that You Know Who and I were kaput?

Apparently I told Jeff one too many times and You Know Who not enough.

As I reached for the hymn book before the opening song, in walked You Know Who. We made eye contact. I quickly looked away. He didn't take my vague hint. Before I knew it, Jeff's scriptures were two chairs away and You Know Who had swiped my neighboring seat.

Jeff saw everything. And laughed. It was too good not to laugh. Even if you are the one whose scriptures were being tossed around and even if it was the seat next to the love of your life that was stolen right before your eyes. Jeff called it. He knew. He's seen it before. The risks of passing the sacrament I guess.

Jeff got back to his seat which was now two seats away from me.

We passed notes behind You Know Who's back the whole meeting. You Know Who didn't really appreciate that. But he was a seat swiper. He had it coming. And he finally caught the hint that we might be over.