Stories of Jeff Excell - The Hitchhiker

This is one of my most favorite Jeff Excell stories.

At the start of every school year I'm all gung-ho about being involved in every activity I can possibly be involved in. One Monday night rolled around and I found myself quite enthusiastic to go to a ward family home evening game night. I think Leslie and Breanne were out of town so Kenz and I ventured out on our own that night.

We walked in and saw the familiar face of Jeff Excell. We also saw the familiar face of Jeff's crush at the time, Kami. They were sitting next to each other with a couple other girls. There were two empty seats on the other side of Jeff so I chose to sit next to the love birds in an effort to sponge up some new juice on the aspiring couple for our matchmaker bishop.

Since Jeff was starting to regularly sit next to us in sacrament meeting, I understand how Kami got the wrong idea when I went to sit next to Jeff. She left the table shortly after we got there. As she headed to the snack table, I was excited to hear the latest developments in their relationship. Jeff was vague with the details. He had been in the ward long enough to know that if you want a relationship to last, you give as little information as possible to fellow wardies.

Jeff, Kenz and I made our way to the snacks and then I said I had to go to the library to do some homework. We said goodbye to Jeff. I dropped Kenz off at home and made my way to the library.

The most ideal place to station yourself in the library computer lab is somewhere with an empty seat on either side of you. This allows for optimal sprawl space and gives you a better shot at avoiding being stuck next to some creep hysterically laughing at lame YouTube videos. I found three empty seats and claimed my territory right in the center of them. I got to work and was impressed with my diligence.

Until someone sat next to me. Now it's a funny thing when you're on a computer in the library. When someone sits next to you, you can't look at them because, if by chance they are looking at you too, that makes for a really awkward situation. So when someone sits next to you, the best thing to do is to continue working on whatever you were doing and pretend to be unaffected by the personal bubble intruder.

Unless that someone starts talking to you. Which my someone did start talking to me. Then it is acceptable to look. Jeff Excell! All intrusions are forgiven if your territory is invaded by a friend.
"You didn't tell me you were coming to the library, too," I said.
"I just remembered I had an assignment to finish up," He claimed.
I watched Jeff check his e-mails, check Facebook, read sports articles. Not once do I remember him working on any assignments. While he was on the verge of hysterically laughing at semi-lame YouTube videos, I started in on my homework again.
"So...how much longer are you going to be here?" He whispered.
"Um...I don't know. I just got here."
He continued YouTubing.
Five minutes later he tried again, "Are you almost done?"
"Why do you care how much longer I have?"
"I need a ride to my car."

I chuckled to myself and decided to finish early to give the stranded Jeff Excell a ride. We walked out to my car and talked about our default subject - Kami. I should have realized Jeff wasn't being vague about Kami to avoid ward juice, but rather because this is the day he will admit he became interested in me. It's not the greatest idea to talk about one crush with another crush. I also didn't put it together at the time, but Jeff's car was only two blocks away from the school. Very walkable if you ask me.

After I dropped Jeff off, I raced back to my apartment eager to tell my roommates about the Jeff Excell sighting. As I walked in the door Kenz said, "That was fast."
"I know. Guess who I saw."
Kenz, "Jeff Excell?"
It was pretty easy to guess that if there was a sighting in the library, it was probably going to be Jeff. "Yes! He made me finish early so I could give him a ride to his car."
Kenz started laughing, "Oh Jeff Excell...wait...do you think Jeff Excell likes you?"
Me, "...No. He likes Kami. We talked about her in the car."
All accusations of Jeff having a crush on me were instantly forgotten. Jeff Excell was just a library computer lab personal bubble intruder who needed a ride to his car.